Working at saying "NO"...

Why is it one of the smallest words in the English Language is one of the hardest to say?

I have a horrible time saying "NO" ~ not only to other people, my kids, my family, but to myself.

I have been doing lots of praying and thinking and more praying on how to take better care of myself and my family and the one thing that my rheumatologist, my chiropractor, my friends, and most of all, my husband, all share and tell me often is that I need to slow down, rest, and learn to say "NO".

I have always had that desire to please and be with others, but sometimes, we have to look deeper than in what we think are our desires and find what is truly in our hearts... I sat down and made a list of what I felt I needed from life and what truly made me happy.

The needs list was really small when I compared it to the happy list... I also made a list of goals that I wanted to accomplish...the most important of these to me was to raise secure children in a love-filled, happy home with a desire to serve the Lord in whatever capacity that "HE" would lead them to.  Another of these goals was to do volunteer work that I felt he was leading me to do. This is a tough one for me,  as sometimes what he is calling me to do, is not what I may want to do, nor what others think I should be doing. But if my mighty Father tells me, I must follow. This is one of the pitfalls of society and our support systems of friends, family, and our spiritual homes.

I have been working on cutting things out of our schedule and it has been hard, because I have always been a on-the-go kind of person and have that nagging, little, evil voice in the back of my head that every so often says, "but what about socialization?" or "do your kids get to do anything?"... and I love hearing the "you should do (this)".

But,  so far, I have eliminated several commitments that took way too much of my time from home and I am working on more. With the kids and my hubby in agreement, we are knocking things off the list right and left. I just ask that it be with God's wisdom that we remove things and not our choice...

I want to be able to use the time when I feel good to be with my family, do family things, and to volunteer for several projects that have weighed heavily on my heart for sometime. I have been praying in earnest that God would show me the way I needed to walk and help me with saying "NO" to things that would wear me down, keep me away from family time, or just general business that wasn't what I needed to be doing.

I come back to this verse again and again when I am faltering in my quest at slowing down and saying "no" ... it gives me strength, peace, and assures me that if I ask he will show me the way.

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways acknowledge Him, And he shall direct your paths."
Proverbs 3:5